A YEAR LATER…

It really does get better

On the 22nd of March, 2025, eight days to my twentieth birthday I made a decision to make my first Substack post. Prior to making that post, I remember thinking about if I would I be happy with myself, how I had lived my life and if I were to die at that moment would I be fulfilled? (400 level was that difficult for me and trust me that wasn’t the last time I thought like that. There were many other times). There and then I knew I wasn’t living a full life; not like I wanted to. I also needed a way to let out my emotions as crying was no longer doing the job, so I did something that day - I wrote for the first time.

To be honest, I found writing way before then but I had never let myself actually write until that day (I don’t know if that makes sense), and so that day I decided to write - to do the one thing I feared the most - be vulnerable, because I believe writing is not accomplished if the reader can’t feel what you felt while you wrote that piece. Writing without emotions to be felt, and a little bit of vulnerability might as well be a research paper.

I wrote about how much my life had changed in four years, and I definitely felt so much lighter after I was done.

Like I promised myself, I truly started living that day. And I can say that for the past year I have learnt to live, and while living, I’ve realized that I wouldn’t be happy if I died now because there’s so much to live for and do in life. Why die?

A year later, two hundred reads to that particular post, ten “posted” posts to my name (not including this one), hundreds of notes and restacks, forty-eight subscribers to my account, seventy-six likes in total on my posts, hundreds of notes liked, hundreds of pieces by other people read, and many more to come and several drafts left gathering dust in my notes app, I’m truly grateful for the opportunity to write, and to read other people’s writings. Even though I’m not consistent with putting out pieces to be read (the main goal wasn’t to be consistent though, it was to let go), I love writing so much.

W is for writing, I love writing so much, I wish I could write all the time (but I’m a student in a school that thinks my life is theirs for the taking).

I’m forever grateful to the Holy Spirit for making me write that and post it. I can also say that my life has changed so much in the year after that, than in the four years before.

It feels like I’ve lived seven other lives since that day because what do you mean I turned twenty-one last week Monday (still can’t believe it), I defended my project two weeks ago, and I’m about to unofficially graduate in twenty four days? Can anybody wake me awake?! Am I dreaming?!

SOMEBODY, ANYBODY, PRAISE THE LORDDDD!!!!! HALLELUYAH!

At the time I wrote my first post I was struggling with 400 level, scared about my project (that I hadn’t even submitted a topic on) and how I was going to write more than sixty pages or even more all by myself when I had never written up to eight pages in an assignment (thank God for group assignments fr) but guess who is graduating guys?!?! ME!

I really can’t believe I’m graduating soon🥹. YOU GUYS I’M ACTUALLY GRADUATINGGGGG! I’ve looked forward to this day since January 14th, 2022. It’s finally my turn.

Here’s a likkle rundown of the past year though:

I’ve learnt to accept that I’m much of an extrovert as I’m an introvert. If I’m being honest though, I think I’m an extrovert that’s now socially awkward because she let herself be an introvert for years. I love making friends and I love meeting new people, but hate talking most times (I actually don’t hate talking. I just hate talking when I don’t want to talk, which is most of the times) and social gatherings make me tired and overstimulated quickly.

I also made the decision to start playing the one sport I’ve wanted to learn for so many years - volleyball. I suck at it really bad, but I love it so much, and I really want to get so good at it. Now, I’m sad I didn’t start earlier because I love it so much, and watching people play the sport fills me with so much happiness (but we shall not dwell on the negative okay?)

In the past year too, I’ve grown closer to some friends, grown distant with some other friends. I wouldn’t say I’ve made new friends yet though, and that’s something I’m trying to change.

Most importantly, I’ve learnt more about myself. I’ve learnt to do things alone, I’ve learnt to love myself more, I’ve learnt to rely on God more (I’m still learning this one), I’ve learnt to run back to God even after going through many emotions that range from anger to sadness, desperation, fear, anxiety, hopelessness, bitterness and tiredness.

And like we already know, I AM ALSO GRADUATING THIS YEAR! GREAT FEAT FR! Hey Alexa, play me See How Far:Gratitude (Reflections) by Victoria Orenze, Nathaniel Bassey, Dunsin Oyekan.

I’m writing this to say that I’m so grateful that I found writing and pushed myself out of my comfort zone to post for “strangers” to read the thoughts that run through my head. Writing has helped me learn to convey feelings that didn’t quite making sense saying with my mouth. Writing has helped me communicate better, it has created an avenue for me to be able to strings my words and emotions better, in a way that makes sense to everyone.

Writing made me realize there’s so much to do and so much to live for, because there’s so much I want to write about.

Writing helped me live.

In the past year, I’ve also realized that I love to smile and laugh, and I have a beautiful smile. My favourite video is one taken my cousin. Shoutout to you Posi!💗 I love you with all my heart.

Just a little realization but I think why writings, artworks and even music is called “a piece” sometimes is because a piece of the artiste went into making that work come to life, and be what it is - your emotions, time, thoughts and many more. Call me Aristotle please for this wonderful realization🙂‍↔️.

T-24days.

Finished Writing: 6th April, 2026 02:42.

Edited: 6th April, 2026 10:18.

Posted: 6th April, 2026 12:14.